Go check the italian version, if you want: https://loscrittorevolante.com/2021/03/04/poesia-riflessione-idee/
Ideas, the ones that come and go from our head, from our life.
They often get confused with the ideas of others …
You don’t understand what is good or bad,
it can happen to act urged by others, but not by oneself and you find yourself with ideas
that doesn’t belong to you, to me.
Since I don’t need them, that I don’t feel better with them,
that I do not feel matured, with them, that I don’t feel grown up, not at all, with them …
I understand that I don’t need them And not only that:
they are poison for me, I’ll kill them.
I scream saying to them: << Out of my head, you are not mine. >>
I kill them with the gun, as if you were committing suicide,
but I only kill part of my head, or what is inside of me.
Sometimes it can happen indeed,
often it happens, to have ideas that do not represent us,
that come from other people’s experiences and lives …
I don’t think there are any bad intentions but …
Sometimes I feel these things like parasites that have taken up residence in my brain …
And as such, I have to push them out of my body.
Like real parasites it’s painful and lousy, but necessary.
And so I understand some of the choices
I’ve made They were unwittingly influenced by ideas Not mine.
So some actions performed were not dictated by my ideas,
sensations, character, but from what I thought it was “better”.
But the best is what we want and owe to ourselves …
Not what others believe. We are all affected, we all have parasites,
however rational one may be, doesn’t mean shit.
I’m so into some things that sometimes,
I just see pictures on instagram, describing situations similar to mine
and that’s enough for me to rethink all that again.
But today I realize that this is not what I think,
that I don’t see these things, that the story about incompatibility is not true,
or at least it’s not my idea.
And I want to expel it all, these damn fucking parasites, from my head
. These ways of living or thinking, nothing of mine!
I don’t want to think like someone else says that “I should” …
I don’t need anything, they are failures.
One should learn from other people’s victories, not from defeats.
I don’t need to learn to lose: it’s all my life that I lose.
I want to learn how to win.
I’m sorry my friends but I’m not doing anything about it Of all this.
So I kill these parasites, out of my brain, you bastards.
It’s not what I really need, you are not what I have fought so much for.
You fucking pests of s***t.
My ideas above all, because I lost for doing things I didn’t want to do and I regret having acted in certain ways.
I want my ideas,