It seems that the world has gone mad… In this last year and a half, almost two.
I’ve only seen bad things happen to me, and to my friends. I have heard very little good news, it seems a terrible and terrible coincidence, that several bad things happen at the same moment, as if we were destined.
Almost as if I were destined to hear and receive all these bad stories.
How is it possible? This wave of hatred, of forced cynicism? By now everyone seems to think like the villains of the movies, those models that were pushing us to reject …
Nobody believes in love now. In friendship, in nothing.
“Love is only cock and pussy”,
“Dreams are only illusions”,
“Friendship is only exploiting each other”.
They all seem like perfect candidates to be the next Marvel villain, seriously! They aren’t glamorous either, as they don’t have ambitions. Just a desire to take revenge …
Sometimes, not even that, since we are not in a world of superheroes, it would be very short to make them so.
A superpower would be enough, and we’d be full of bad guys.
I sincerely feel the desire to isolate myself from this continuous and poisonous reality. Maybe “they don’t exist”, as you say, but why don’t you try?
No desire to change things and get involved. The truth is that you are just a bunch of cowards without balls, who didn’t have the desire (because you have the strength) to do something.
In short, no desire to do anything. Reality is like this, and pretend it’s okay. Such a pity.
What the fuck are you trying to study and people next to do? If you don’t believe in anything, what’s worth living?
It’s like in “Home Alone”, what do you do with a heart if you don’t use it?
You only seem capable of accusing each other, and as Rocky also says: “Cowards do that, and that ain’t you, YOU’RE BETETR THAN THAT!”
In short, you want things, and when you can’t, all you do is blame others. Never do shit to change your life …
And it ends in this cynicism, and these other antics.
You seem like clowns to me, yes.
So, what happened? You have collapsed. You have understood, yes, even rightly, that the world has not given you what you believed in.
The truth, perhaps, is that you are only weak.
Maybe, I am stronger. I decided not to give in to hatred, resentment, everything that hurts me, that took away the things I believed in.
I decided I wanted to continue believing it. All the more so if no one wants to do it anymore.
Perhaps, after all, making certain sacrifices is worth making. What should I do, after all? Should I think and act like others? Not giving a damn about everything and everyone? Should I try, at least?
Would it make me feel better?
Should I do like the same people I’ve criticized? Should I do as who turned me away? Should I use their own excuses?
Should I stop believing? And become that way too? Would I really be better off? Without feelings, without perhaps, not even thoughts?
God, it feels like I’m being brainwashed, and I laugh, yes, IT MAKES ME LAUGH.
Because it was said that I, want to do this thing to YOU, S ****.
And so, I’m supposed to be that way, for what exactly? Not to sound strange? To not be me, to be your friend?
I can’t really believe the series of bullshit I’ve heard these days. Honestly? It does not seem to me that I am the “crazy” and “unreasonable” one.
Those who have lost their reason are you, because without feelings, without thoughts, there is no sense in existing. Nothing has it anymore.
And then, at least I’ll try,
at least I’ll try, indeed: I’ll believe it. I will stay here, still, ready to fight, and to prove that what I believe in …
Even if, it must be said, it is truly a thankless task … but you can see that someone …
has to do it.
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